My sympathies. Serious +1 to you coming up with your own definitions of success, and living to those, rather than piecing things together unconsciously from what's swirling in the memeverse around you. (Please note that this is a "Listen to hypocrites, they know what they're talking about!" moment :-}).
WRT accidentally steamrolling people, I'd suggest reaching for a bigger picture. There's a spectrum here, with "I make my choices and rely on others to make theirs" at one end and "I'm responsible for the world" at the other (and madness in between :-}). And sometimes people take satisfaction in satisfying others desires, and sometimes they find themselves doing things that they later wish they wouldn't, and sometimes both. You need to choose where you're going to set your boundaries around taking responsibilities for others, and while that may be a function of the person you're with, it's still a choice you make and then make your peace with. There are two people involved; it won't always work perfectly.
I'd be very surprised if your interactions with Lion weren't always pretty clear and clean and coming from a place of respect for his choices, and I'd be moderately surprised if there were many interactions that if you examined them closely you could say "Yes, it was appropriate for me to take responsibility for him there and not do that; ooops". My sense is that the time with you has been something that he's shaped *more* than most things in his life.
All IMO, of course. But I wouldn't think this is a big worry.
no subject
WRT accidentally steamrolling people, I'd suggest reaching for a bigger picture. There's a spectrum here, with "I make my choices and rely on others to make theirs" at one end and "I'm responsible for the world" at the other (and madness in between :-}). And sometimes people take satisfaction in satisfying others desires, and sometimes they find themselves doing things that they later wish they wouldn't, and sometimes both. You need to choose where you're going to set your boundaries around taking responsibilities for others, and while that may be a function of the person you're with, it's still a choice you make and then make your peace with. There are two people involved; it won't always work perfectly.
I'd be very surprised if your interactions with Lion weren't always pretty clear and clean and coming from a place of respect for his choices, and I'd be moderately surprised if there were many interactions that if you examined them closely you could say "Yes, it was appropriate for me to take responsibility for him there and not do that; ooops". My sense is that the time with you has been something that he's shaped *more* than most things in his life.
All IMO, of course. But I wouldn't think this is a big worry.