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Aptitudes, my dad, celebrations if you can believe that, 47
I took Friday off work and actually didn't work... all weekend.
Friday, instead, I spent the whole business day getting aptitude testing done at the Johnson O'Connor research foundation. It was expensive, and I did it largely in order to look for blind spots in my own thinking about what to do post-tech... it's been a long time since I chose what to do without thinking about how much it pays. I don't have my results yet, and won't for a week or so, but it was pretty clear to me which tests were fun and stretched my brain enjoyably vs which ones turned into a slog. Those last ones were probably the most useful. I have thoughts about the testing methodology, and suspect that some of it should be updated, but am withholding judgement until I see the usefulness of the results.
Saturday was my actual birthday. It was lovely outside. I had breakfast with my squirrel, lots of time for an inefficient workout (my hand was sore from all the handwriting the day before), and dinner with the bug at the new View Boston / Cloud Terrace thing at the top of the Prudential Center. I had timed it for sunset, and we wound up eating dinner while watching lights come up in the city below. As the squirrel said, it sounded very 'mantic. And it was 'mantic! We saw a couple get engaged up on one of the viewing decks, which probably happens all the time.
Sunday we went and rode roller coasters at Six Flags with the whole squirrel family, as a late birthday celebration. The baby squirrel is not sure at all about this "roller coaster" thing, and the party ended up splitting with me and the bug hanging back for a couple more hours of riding than the rest. But in the meantime, did I get to ride a pretty blue-and-purple roller coaster once while seated BETWEEN my two partners and squeezing their hands and kicking my little paws in the air with joy? YES I DID. May that moment of joy be a sustaining one.
Okay... now put all of that in juxtaposition with the other thing that was happening: getting bad news every single day about my dad. He remains in the ICU and hasn't actually been lucid since last Wednesday now. One day he was really combative and saying some things that might have been related to flashbacks; he sometimes knows he's thirsty. I told you that the actual heart procedure went well on Wednesday but there was also something about an inoperable clot. Worse, the heart itself is in disagreement, and he now has "low EF" of 15%, which apparently some people can survive with but is also considered severe heart failure (WTF, medical profession). My aunt the ex-nurse is now out there to be with his wife, for which I am very grateful since she at least can pass on the technical terms for me to search on. She thinks we may be dealing with a stroke either at surgery time or maybe the day after surgery; they're doing a CT scan today to try to figure that out. But it could also be more related to PTSD resurgence. It obviously sucks to post about this in the middle when we don't really know anything and there's nothing useful I can do about it, and we have no idea whether he'll be coming back from this at all. Yet here we are.
Friday, instead, I spent the whole business day getting aptitude testing done at the Johnson O'Connor research foundation. It was expensive, and I did it largely in order to look for blind spots in my own thinking about what to do post-tech... it's been a long time since I chose what to do without thinking about how much it pays. I don't have my results yet, and won't for a week or so, but it was pretty clear to me which tests were fun and stretched my brain enjoyably vs which ones turned into a slog. Those last ones were probably the most useful. I have thoughts about the testing methodology, and suspect that some of it should be updated, but am withholding judgement until I see the usefulness of the results.
Saturday was my actual birthday. It was lovely outside. I had breakfast with my squirrel, lots of time for an inefficient workout (my hand was sore from all the handwriting the day before), and dinner with the bug at the new View Boston / Cloud Terrace thing at the top of the Prudential Center. I had timed it for sunset, and we wound up eating dinner while watching lights come up in the city below. As the squirrel said, it sounded very 'mantic. And it was 'mantic! We saw a couple get engaged up on one of the viewing decks, which probably happens all the time.
Sunday we went and rode roller coasters at Six Flags with the whole squirrel family, as a late birthday celebration. The baby squirrel is not sure at all about this "roller coaster" thing, and the party ended up splitting with me and the bug hanging back for a couple more hours of riding than the rest. But in the meantime, did I get to ride a pretty blue-and-purple roller coaster once while seated BETWEEN my two partners and squeezing their hands and kicking my little paws in the air with joy? YES I DID. May that moment of joy be a sustaining one.
Okay... now put all of that in juxtaposition with the other thing that was happening: getting bad news every single day about my dad. He remains in the ICU and hasn't actually been lucid since last Wednesday now. One day he was really combative and saying some things that might have been related to flashbacks; he sometimes knows he's thirsty. I told you that the actual heart procedure went well on Wednesday but there was also something about an inoperable clot. Worse, the heart itself is in disagreement, and he now has "low EF" of 15%, which apparently some people can survive with but is also considered severe heart failure (WTF, medical profession). My aunt the ex-nurse is now out there to be with his wife, for which I am very grateful since she at least can pass on the technical terms for me to search on. She thinks we may be dealing with a stroke either at surgery time or maybe the day after surgery; they're doing a CT scan today to try to figure that out. But it could also be more related to PTSD resurgence. It obviously sucks to post about this in the middle when we don't really know anything and there's nothing useful I can do about it, and we have no idea whether he'll be coming back from this at all. Yet here we are.
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