Written yesterday

[flexagon]

On Friday my boss asked me how I was and I said "Urgggggggh, I really need a weekend off" so that's what I'm taking. Today so far I slept 10.5 hours, finally caught a Raikou in Pokemon Go, and made it to the sock store to buy some new iLux Nu-Nuvola socks. In theory I think $20 socks with cashmere and silk in them are as ridiculous as you do, but the one pair I bought last Christmas with apfelsingail has been in constant rotation since then and are by far my favorite socks, with basically no signs of wear or shrinkage, so another pair seemed called for. (Plus, the walk was good for hatching eggs for the Pokemon Go Equinox event.)

Trading a couple of emails/texts with Quarte and the cute girl was nice for remembering that new/tentative things (at least when I have them) don't always feel threatening to older things.

I also went out to Boonfuck Waltham to work with Fine-J, who did a nice job guiding me back toward perfectionist training without giving me too much shit for my sloppy work in between lessons. He also reassured me that I'm not the only person to lie awake thinking self-hating thoughts about my spinal proprioception... yeah, most people may not do that, but a lot of circus people, he says, can relate. I did some good presses off an elevation for him, and felt less alone afterward.

Comments

[angelofthenorth]

I don't think those socks sound ridiculous. They sound wonderful. Can you get someone to hand knit you some?

[flexagon]

:-)

I'm a knitter myself! And I did a pair of socks once on #1 needles, so I know how many hours it takes. Kind of makes $20 look like a bargain.

[angelofthenorth]

I wish I'd known. It was sheep fest this weekend and I could have got you some gorgeous artisan high wear yarn

[flexagon]

Eh. Thanks for the thought, but I'm not an especially active knitter right now. What with typing for a living and doing handstands for exercise, it was too much to ALSO do a wrist/forearm thing for crafting. So it's on pause.

[jadia]

Do you usually have to work on the weekends?

[flexagon]

Well... define "have to". :-/

[jadia]

:-(

Do you work most weekends? Do most of your colleagues? Do you feel like you have to in order to get your work done or qualify for promotion etc.?

[flexagon]

Yeah... on reflection, I feel I have to in order to get my work done. I go to meetings all day and write things down for myself to do, but there's no time to follow up except for evenings/weekends.

Most of the other managers work weekends too. I don't always mind, but sometimes it gets old.

[drwex]

Hooray for feeling less alone!

[cordjostler]

I'm guessing it's tongue in cheek, but I'm curious about "perfectionist training". (as someone who is something of a perfectionist and is generally pretty stressed about it)

[flexagon]

I'm training to do a thing with good form -- for an easy metaphor let's say I'm trying to bicep curl a heavy weight. And maybe I can't quite do it while breathing, keeping my back straight and isolating the motion to just my elbow, but I CAN do it if I hold my breath, heave with my knees, get my back into it and duck under the weight. Or even just one or two of those cheats.

It's really unpleasant and stupid-feeling to try (with good form) without the weight going anywhere. But my coach wants me to do that more often and see that as a success (because yay, I held my form, I'm working my bicep), without succumbing to the temptation of just heaving the goddamn weight up there because it feels like then I did something.

[cordjostler]

gotcha. guessing this is the handstands. progress is good. hope it keeps going well.

[flexagon]

Thanks. :-)