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flexagonSo, Barbara Ehrenreich has a new book out. Its title is Bait and Switch: The (Futile) Pursuit of the American Dream. Apparently it sort of sucks and she wrote a much better book on the middle class back in 1989,1 so I won't be reading it, but I wonder... her last big seller was Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America. Can I safely assume she'll continue creeping up the food chain with something on the order of What to Wear: Being Rich Is (Sorta) Hard Too?
I haven't been writing about my life because it's been mostly depressing and boring. I spent most of last week getting depressed, finally crying all over my bug on Sunday, and am now slowly wandering back up from being depressed.... yes, fascinating, I know. Oh, and I've been working: equally exciting.
I did get to see a friend's wedding last weekend. It was quite beautiful but (and this is a sign of my depression, not a comment on the wedding) what's lingered most with me is someone commenting that most of the party looked like a J.Crew advertisement, and realizing that I do indeed feel an unnerving pressure to stay at least as skinny as I am now... or more so... forever. Sigh. Pass the lentils and water, please. And then I had my two-year anniversary dinner with my bug, which was much nicer in some ways (the lobster ravioli, for example, and the utterly hilarious fact that in the end we both got each other new towels). I reconfirmed that my liver remains completely incompetent when presented with alcohol, though, apparently having to look it up in the manual every time. Alcohol, let's see... index, A, Alc, here it is on page 386, um... oh that's right, it's acetaldehyde then acetic acid! But criminy. I forgot again where I put my ALDH2.
I had all kinds of ideas of what to blog about when I sat down, but they're fading. Oh, one thing: I'm finally coming to terms with the idea that change may be harder for me than it is for a lot of people. I didn't believe it for a long time, but several people have said this to me lately, including my mother. She, in particular, had some interesting stories about how when I was a kid I'd get upset even if she told me we would visit the grocery store and then the bank (for example) but then we did those things in the opposite order. And yes, I know I dislike it when a plan is changed. And yes, it is hard for me to quit certain things, leave jobs and break up with people.2 I just never thought that was unusual... but maybe it is. It's not necessarily the worst dysfunction. Just means I should be more careful than most when making choices, which I often already am. So I guess more than anything I wish nobody would give me shit about it.
My hapless coworker has been spotted and identified as hapless by our new manager, who I will call Silver Fox because he's exactly what you imagine when you think of a tall, thin athletic guy in his 50s. Said hapless coworker wandered into the office last night and treated me and Dan the Cat to a long talk on how he's afraid he'll get fired, and how he's heard it's hard to get on Silver Fox's good side once you're on his bad side, and he thinks it will come down to his team's opinion of him and he hopes he's proven he has some value.... iiieeeearrrrgh! It was so painful. We were horrified into near total speechlessness. At some point I said something about how you have to find people's style and work with it, and Dan the Cat said something about how you do sometimes have to decide, when new management comes along, whether you still want to stay in a certain situation. This is better than what I said, because it meant quit now, please, it'll be easier on everyone. I would have said the same if I'd found the right words.
I confess, and I am a bad person for this, I've been looking forward to Silver Fox taking over our team precisely because he may spell the end of the hapless coworker. I bear HC no ill will, but working with him is almost physically painful, like watching someone get kicked over and over again. It's hard to think anything aside from please let it end. :-/
1 Fear of Falling, for you curious folk.
2 Note, however, I found it easy as hell to leave Montana, despite having lived there all my life, and I like moving. One thing people miss is that I'm not so bad with positive change.
I haven't been writing about my life because it's been mostly depressing and boring. I spent most of last week getting depressed, finally crying all over my bug on Sunday, and am now slowly wandering back up from being depressed.... yes, fascinating, I know. Oh, and I've been working: equally exciting.
I did get to see a friend's wedding last weekend. It was quite beautiful but (and this is a sign of my depression, not a comment on the wedding) what's lingered most with me is someone commenting that most of the party looked like a J.Crew advertisement, and realizing that I do indeed feel an unnerving pressure to stay at least as skinny as I am now... or more so... forever. Sigh. Pass the lentils and water, please. And then I had my two-year anniversary dinner with my bug, which was much nicer in some ways (the lobster ravioli, for example, and the utterly hilarious fact that in the end we both got each other new towels). I reconfirmed that my liver remains completely incompetent when presented with alcohol, though, apparently having to look it up in the manual every time. Alcohol, let's see... index, A, Alc, here it is on page 386, um... oh that's right, it's acetaldehyde then acetic acid! But criminy. I forgot again where I put my ALDH2.
I had all kinds of ideas of what to blog about when I sat down, but they're fading. Oh, one thing: I'm finally coming to terms with the idea that change may be harder for me than it is for a lot of people. I didn't believe it for a long time, but several people have said this to me lately, including my mother. She, in particular, had some interesting stories about how when I was a kid I'd get upset even if she told me we would visit the grocery store and then the bank (for example) but then we did those things in the opposite order. And yes, I know I dislike it when a plan is changed. And yes, it is hard for me to quit certain things, leave jobs and break up with people.2 I just never thought that was unusual... but maybe it is. It's not necessarily the worst dysfunction. Just means I should be more careful than most when making choices, which I often already am. So I guess more than anything I wish nobody would give me shit about it.
My hapless coworker has been spotted and identified as hapless by our new manager, who I will call Silver Fox because he's exactly what you imagine when you think of a tall, thin athletic guy in his 50s. Said hapless coworker wandered into the office last night and treated me and Dan the Cat to a long talk on how he's afraid he'll get fired, and how he's heard it's hard to get on Silver Fox's good side once you're on his bad side, and he thinks it will come down to his team's opinion of him and he hopes he's proven he has some value.... iiieeeearrrrgh! It was so painful. We were horrified into near total speechlessness. At some point I said something about how you have to find people's style and work with it, and Dan the Cat said something about how you do sometimes have to decide, when new management comes along, whether you still want to stay in a certain situation. This is better than what I said, because it meant quit now, please, it'll be easier on everyone. I would have said the same if I'd found the right words.
I confess, and I am a bad person for this, I've been looking forward to Silver Fox taking over our team precisely because he may spell the end of the hapless coworker. I bear HC no ill will, but working with him is almost physically painful, like watching someone get kicked over and over again. It's hard to think anything aside from please let it end. :-/
1 Fear of Falling, for you curious folk.
2 Note, however, I found it easy as hell to leave Montana, despite having lived there all my life, and I like moving. One thing people miss is that I'm not so bad with positive change.
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Date: 2005-09-14 08:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-15 07:53 am (UTC)I'm sorry you've been down though. :( It sounds like a rough week. *Hugs*
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