Jan. 12th, 2025

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All my people are taking interesting classes now -- the bug is taking a songwriting class (when I started typing this, he was working on a "homework song" about circus school), I'm taking drawing and also a 4-week series on contortion handstands, the squirrel has signed up for a four-week fairly intense baking class. He says he wants to get over his fear of flour. Aren't we amusing critters, us humans, with our self-improvement thing and our curious brains?

The bad news in the world is admittedly getting to me, especially the bad news in tech. Meta just canceled all its contracts with fact-checkers, killed all its DEI programs and changed its hate speech policies to explicitly allow some bullshit. I'll just quote Wired: In a notable shift, the company now says it allows “allegations of mental illness or abnormality when based on gender or sexual orientation"... yep. I guess Zuck also appeared on Rogan's podcast spewing garbage about "masculine energy" like his company isn't already 2/3 male? Anyway, McDonald's has also killed its DEI programs, and my CEO has been saying some stuff so I'm 90% sure we're about to kill ours, too. Something gross to think about as we all keep waiting for January layoffs. *puke*

So -- what a nice time to step away, isn't it? Seven more weeks until I can tell my boss I'm leaving, and then... then I won't be helping this enshittified industry anymore. And I won't be paying massive income taxes to fund the new incoming federal government. Just maybe, suddenly, there's a "conscientious objector" angle to my desire to step back, earn less and hole up. It might be even better to fight to save the world, but we can safely assume I don't have that in me, at least not very much, not this year. But I can use my savings to live quietly, and at least not fund the madness. I know there are big thinks remaining to be thought, about how much precious time and energy to give to my inner circle, my town, state, country, world. But I'm really going to need to get to a quieter place to think that through, and by the time I have done that the calculus will have shifted. So I'm trying to leave those thoughts alone.

This week has brought several small-scale delights to my own tiny life:

  • The new H-Mart did indeed open, very close to me. I went for the grand opening; it's magnificent, wacky, inspiring. I have tried a lot of new foods in the last three days (frozen kimbap!) and learned how to open a pomegranate.

  • Mildly ridiculous 4th-anniversary date with the squirrel. We dressed up all gothy and went to the most expensive omakase place in town, then paid for it out of our rental income that's been otherwise just piling up for the last year and a half. (Funny to think of us running a business together, but we do....) I had a amazing passionfruit/yuzu mocktail, and learned that nice restaurants are happy to give you a clean copy of that night's menu as a souvenir, which is something I'd never heard of before.

  • I finished up a session of workouts for my distance coach really strong, with some good press work that we were both happy with; and then contortion handstand class today was a lot of fun too. It felt good to work on flexibility and extended positions, after the usual golden cage of "hold your whole body tight" straight handstands. My quads are extra sore and I don't know what I did to them, but a) that's okay and b) oh yeah, I went to Boda Borg yesterday.

  • The little black squirrel is now named Wispy (though I like it better uncapitalized: wispy) and I've started giving her water as well as food. The first day I put out the water she was very skittish and careful about the bowl, but eventually drank from it; the second day she was confident. She's clever, and looking more solid and adult than she was initially; the human squirrel mocks me about this new relationship, and also teases me that wispy maybe has many food sources and isn't so wispy. Are we body-shaming the wildlife now?, I parry. It feels good to have a nascent friendship with this small wild soul.



Less fun: I was out sick on Monday and Tuesday, so I didn't get any kind of rollicking start on work in the new year; my pet projects remain unstarted, and that might feel bad given how little time is left to do them. I feel healthy again though, and it wasn't all bad to start off the year with easy 1:1 meetings.

I'm planning to do a no-buy January, outside of consumables, and probably mostly a dry one too. Not in a big self-denial way, more just quieting my system after the traditional excess and influx of the holidays. There's nothing I need right now.

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