The big picture... and pictures of me and my bug. Pictures pictures.

Something's wrong with me... I'm just not wired to think about my career, or for that matter the big picture of the world, without spinning out and going nuts. I'm trying hard to retrain myself into thinking about them sometimes, and then not, and then thinking about them again, but it seems like all thoughts of relaxing and taking my time are intellectual. Emotionally, I've been tending to panic. HLM did what he could to calm me last night... I think he was probably doing his husbandly duty more than being spontaneously turned on, but it was a loving act and it helped.

Anyway... I'm not going to give up, so that may mean doing some scaling back and relaxing this summer. (Oh dear... not that.) Maybe I'll take a month off from TKD like I did last year, when the weather gets really hot. Or maybe I'll take a vacation, which I always forget I can do.

I haven't done much this week besides work and finish painting the bedroom--the pattern (remember the pictures? -- sorry to casual readers, link is friends-only) goes all the way around the room now. I went to TKD and lifted weights as usual. Today should be more interesting though... I'm leaving work at 2:00 to go to a portrait sitting with HLM. Snooty, huh? :) It's because we got a gift certificate for the sitting and one 8 x 10 print in the mail from our real estate agent as a thank-you for bringing them business, and after calling the studio I learned that the certificate is worth over $200. So we decided to use it. We don't have any good pictures of the two of us together that aren't from the wedding, so I'm actually pretty happy at the thought of having more.

There.

I just called the massage place about getting a deep tissue massage. See, I can be nice to myself. Yes I can.

Edit: and I'm also signed up for a week of vacation in June.

Portrait sitting

Wow. That pretty much confirmed my image of myself as the least photogenic girl on earth... even a fourth-generation super-high-class photographer (who charges tens of thousands for huge poster-size portraits printed on canvas, things meant for palaces and museums and such) can only make me look good about one out of every ten times. ( He tried, though, and sitting was fun. )

So that was today's little glimpse into how the extravagant people live. It was interesting to see HLM's reactions to pictures of him and of me... he likes pictures of me that show a much wider range of expression than I find remotely attractive, and I'm more tolerant of some of the things his face does than he is. I guess we're all just picky about ourselves.