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Ooh... these little earthquakes... here we go again. Two sad things have happened. First, I wrote kfb a letter on Friday laying out a few things and saying we both needed to take about three giant steps back on the Soyfetus-Kfb Relationship 2.0, because boldly pushing it into places it's never gone before is maybe not for the best. I got an awfully terse response. :( Still, I don't have any idea what else I might have done that would have been better for all concerned.

Second, my dad's neighbor Mr. T has died. This guy was a friend and did many odd jobs for my dad over the last 20 years... he was a bit older and smoked a lot, and so his death can't be much of a surprise, but with every death I think my father sees more of a closing down than a cycle. I have wondered often in the last few weeks why I'm getting less email from him, whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, but I don't know. One thing about having a close relative with poor mental health: you learn detachment in a serious way. I'd better write him back though.

Despite these things, I feel all right today. The long weekend was as restful as some week-long vacations I've had, maybe in part because I was so flattened by the heat and just sat around reading. I got one or two of those days that seem to last a preternaturally long time. So... now to just see if I can make this week a productive one.
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January 2026

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