Today sucks because...

[flexagon]

...I went to the gym (a fairly long trip, considering the bus schedule) and almost immediately got evacuated because there was a fire in the building next door. Poo. Then I walked 10 mins down the street, missing the bus, to buy a present for my mom, and the store was closed until noon (which it would have been if I'd finished working out). Then I had a sticky bus ride/walk to work. Then I called my mom to say happy b-day and she wasn't home. At least there are showers here. At some point I must drag myself down to the crappy gym and try to pretend it's the nice one.

And, christ, I nearly forgot--just to add to my list of things to worry about, HLM's friends have decided to throw him a bachelor party. Yippee fucking skip... of all the wedding traditions I hate the concept of, that'd be the one I was most looking forward to avoiding. (For the record, I'm not so much worried about anything he might actually do, I just... despise... and, yes, am terrified by, the thinking behind these things. HLM isn't very into it either). Anyway. Neither of us wants to be rude to his friends, and the party itself isn't that big a deal. So now I will have to have one too, although I don't think the Thurs before the wedding, when his will be, will work at all well for me. I'll have just flown back in from New Jersey, so I'll be tired, and believe you me, sending me out drinking without my bug, when in fact my bug is off doing god-knows-what, would be a good way to get a wedding called off... I can hardly imagine a scenario more designed to make me freak out. (You must remember, HLM's presence is usually what stands between me and paranoia when I drink--so if he were not there but instead off at a strip club or something, I don't think I'd hold up too well no matter how much I may trust him when I'm sober). So I'd rather do something before that business trip, instead. What are you up to, say, the night of Saturday the 6th, bluechromis? Please say you'll help, please please please. You would seem to be qualified for this sort of thing. How about hitting P-town and seeing a drag show?

As for what I really will do Thursday, I will have my mother and M newly in town, maybe other people too, so I should have plenty of opportunity to do nice untroubling things. :b

Comments

No problem with type 3

[flexagon]

Sometimes girls are all hot air, too, you know. :) I'm definitely having a 3 for my -ette party! As I told HLM, I'm still uncomfortable, but reassured by the idea of having my TKD buddies along. I plan to look at pretty gay men with a catty and discerning eye, and wear big earrings, and shoot the shit. It's just starting to sound like fun.

Thanks for the categories, at any rate--I will talk to him a bit more. I don't think either one of us would feel good about a type 2, and neither would the married-friends contingent. So he'll just have to be smart enough to keep the scary single friends under control.

Re: No problem with type 3

[hiddenbear.livejournal.com]

Honestly (and please don't kill the messenger), you heading to a male strip club opens up stuff on the bachelor party end.
There are a lot of different levels at a female strip club: one can just watch, one can be stuffing $$$ in G-strings, one can get lap dances (private or not), and one can go to the VIP room (never been ... can't say what happens).
If you open it up that you are headed to a strip club, without setting down what is allowed and what is not if he goes to one, his friends might push him further than you want him to go.

Are you sure you are okay with him going to a strip club? Have you been to strip clubs before (together or not)?

His friends may see you going to a strip club as opening a lot of doors for him. Make sure to close the ones ahead of time that you don't want open.

I plan to look at pretty gay men with a catty and discerning eye
Yeah ... but what do your fellow bachelorettes plan on you doing ... there is a lot of touching going on at male strip clubs.

....

Okay, now that I have gotten that out ... I am in no way against a couple both having parties where they head to strip clubs. Reasonable, makes for a fun party, far far far better than hiring a stripper, etc. Where you run into trouble is if the couple is headed into unknown territory without proper guidelines ... so if this isn't unknown territory, please ignore all my rambling.

Ugh

[hiddenbear.livejournal.com]

That all came out sounding really dumb. I don't mean to lay out such obvious things as if they are revolutionary or to say that I don't think you know all this. I'm just worried that you are getting all worked up about this and in reality 99.9% of bachelor parties have no impact on the marriage.

We're talking about a drag show

[bluechromis.livejournal.com]

Not a male strip club....two totally different animals. There is no stripping at drag shows, as that would sort of let the "cat" out of the bag.