Reinvention, brachiation, I like my coffee like I like my female leaders in tech

[flexagon]

Came across a cheesy 10 rules for reinvention article in last month's Psychology Today that had one really good tip in it: list the pros and cons of changing, and inventory all the forces working for and against change.

I do pro/con lists all the time, but the idea of listing all the forces is a great one -- dramatic, too. My life as an epic battlefield, with armies massing on the darkling plain. Unfortunately for this life tip, I don't have any epic changes I want to make right now; mostly I just want to settle into my latest poly/sex situation, train for handstands and for fun athletic stuff coming up this summer, and slowly figure out whether I want to be a director at work or not.

Speaking of fun athletic stuff, I ran a mile yesterday for the first time in ages, and today I picked up some brachiation (hanging/swinging) drills. The "ape twist", shown from 4:57 to about 5:27 in this video, is an absolute bitch... way harder than it looks! I talked one of my trainer friends at the gym into trying it and he agreed.

In other news, a major news source reported yesterday on how shitty my workplace is and how my co-workers don't feel safe. AWESOME. Tech industry, how long will I give you exactly before I decide I'm too rich and you're making me too bitter? A few more years, but your clock is ticking. Loudly.

Comments

[drwex]

I don't have any epic changes I want to make right now

I went through a period like that. I had a bunch of goals, achieved them, and then found myself going "OK, now what?" Interesting period in my life, since the universe provided me with answers, eventually.

Tech industry, how long will I give you exactly before I decide I'm too rich and you're making me too bitter?

I'm sorry this is happening. From the little I've read it looks like your company is under an organized attack from inside and out orchestrated by some of the worst trolls active today. I hope your company can fight them off because if not it bodes badly for the rest of us.

[flexagon]

I have a bunch of goals and am working on achieving them. So a course change does not sound beneficial. I look forward to the next "OK, now what" phase very much, but it's not for just yet.

From the little I've read it looks like your company is under an organized attack from inside and out orchestrated by some of the worst trolls active today. I hope your company can fight them off because if not it bodes badly for the rest of us.

I think you're correct, and I hope so also. I'm fighting from the inside!

[railwaymadness]

You mention that your co-workers don't feel safe. Do you feel safe?

Here's part of why I'm curious: Over the last few months I've realized that one of the things keeping me at my current company is the fact that I feel very safe here as a woman in tech. I wouldn't say that there are no issues at all -- my coworkers and I are still entrenched in existing United States culture, after all. And as a company we could definitely be doing more to improve. But I am grappling with how important that feeling of safety is to me and whether I want to let it play a role in my ongoing deliberations about looking for alternative employment.

[flexagon]

I do feel safe. Pragmatically speaking, I'm too senior for most people at work to fuck with me now -- I would love to get some really egregious sexual harassment so that I could demonstrate just how to get someone fired (out of a cannon, into the sun), but it's not gonna happen. And physically speaking, well, mild to moderate sexual harassment doesn't create a fear response in me anyway. I've handled people saying dumb things or doing minor groping/touching in the past without particular trauma. At this point I could conceivably be afraid of being doxxed or harassed online, which is what's happening to some of my more visibly liberal co-workers (particularly those whose names show up in the evidence for the James Damore case), but it seems vaguely unlikely, and I'm not too worried about any of that until/unless it gets into identity theft, anyway. Things blow over.

So what scares me is the prospect of folks I work with (especially female-identified, more junior ones) losing time, productivity, energy and eventually career success to this overall shitstorm. I've lost enough time, productivity and energy to be bad enough!

If you might be interested in Zillian, I'd be happy to feed your resume into the hopper.